The 911 of the week:
I reconnected with an old friend (a girl) that I haven’t seen in ten years. I have a girlfriend and there is nothing wrong with her, but now I cannot stop thinking about this old friend. We live close enough to see each other in person and I have been tempted to set up a meeting. Should I set up a date with the old friend or let it go?
Dear Mr. Back to the Future,
There is a strong psychological reason for you thinking about jumping ship and running off with the blast from the past. When we reconnect with a person that we knew long ago, the memory of them and you from that time comes back and clouds your judgment. For most of us, there is a fondness for when we were more innocent and maybe we see our former self as more authentic. It is possible that the girl from yesterday knows you better and in a different way than your girlfriend might. A good way to keep things in perspective is to think about all the ways that you have changed since you last saw this girl. Think of all the bad choices you made and all the women you put yourself inside before meeting your current girlfriend. Now imagine that girl doing all the bad things you have done. Who is the better catch now?
To see if you are mature enough to meet this person without diving into a hot knew you since middle school sexual affair, I have a test for you. Tell your girlfriend that you connected with a friend from way back, and explain the feelings you are having to her. Invite her to meet the friend with you. If that doesn’t sound like a great idea, then it is not a good idea to meet his girl. If you want to have a pen pal then by all means, keep in touch. Since I am not just a cockblocking advice columnist, here is me throwing you a bone. If you are over your girlfriend and ready to cheat and or break up with her anyway go an ahead and have a play date with the old friend. Be a gentleman and keep your peepee out of her veevee until you can assess old news and officially break it off with current events. Best of luck, remember that you matter most!
Author of I’m Sorry, You are Not a Pick-Up Artist
photo credit here